So What Ever Happened To That Peloton?

It's been a while since I mentioned my Peloton. That Peloton that I was so in love with in 2018... Yes, I still have it, but I don't know what happened to that loving feeling. 

The last time I mentioned it was in July of last year when I said that I knew that my blood counts were significantly lower when I was riding the Peloton and I said I was going to get back on it.  I didn't... 

Here is where I was on February 3, 2019, the day I reached my 100th bike ride.

Here is where I am today!

I've owned my bike since approximately August, 2018, that's almost five years! In that time I've worked out 803 times (I don't really count meditations as workouts but Peloton does so...) I've only ridden my bike 139 more times, but I've done 223 more strength workout and I've completed 63 runs. 

For the last couple of years I've been running with the Peloton app more and cycling less. I've also really gotten into the strength workouts, most recently trying the standing core strength workouts. I love those!

I know I shouldn't beat myself up about this. I know that 803 workouts is still something. 803 divided by 5 years is 160.6 workouts per year. That's 13.38 workouts per month or approximately 3.34 times per week. Or as some of the coaches point out, it's still working out more than people who don't work out. 

I can't explain why I haven't been on the bike and why I've been running more than cycling. I've written about how I self-sabotage and here. It didn't help when I logged on the other day and I received a warning about the bike seat recall. I'm yet to address that issue, but I know it has to be done. Luckily I've never had any issues with my seat thus far. 

Either way, I do have to call about the seat and I do need to get back on the bike. I still love everything about Peloton, especially the strength workouts and the walks and runs. My challenge is to get myself back on the bike, and loving the rides again.

I want to set a #400by54 goal for myself for both Strength and Cycling. I know I can do it for Strength, but can I reach the same goal for Cycling? I want to! 

New goal for the second part of the year and my soon to be half birthday in August!

An Empty Nest and the World is My Oyster

We are more than halfway through 2022 and I've only blogged two times this year. My biggest personal accomplishment this year has been that I ran several 5K runs and my first 10K. My second biggest achievement has been that I finally put my 25 year old novel out into the world. The third goal I've accomplished is to do well in my career, chiefly making my goals consistently. My current and most pressing goal is to get these kids off to New York and for them to find an apartment. I picture them living over a deli or restaurant in a building like this is Queens. This is a photo of a building in Brooklyn, but same idea.

I am at a very interesting point in my life. Both my kids will be gone to college now and I'm going to be somewhat of an empty nester. I say "somewhat" because they will still be coming home for holidays and the summer. (There's also the possibility that Miranda may go to medical school in Houston next year.) Other than those times, I will be alone for three months at a time to do more of the things I want to do. 

I wrote about this a year ago and how I felt like I was on the cusp of something amazing. I still feel like that and that I'll be open to more opportunities. I feel like I did in 1993 when I had just graduated from college, started working, and I had my whole life ahead of me. I was free to do anything I wanted to do. I wish I had really appreciated it then. But I'll be there again soon, except this time I have a lifetime of experience that I didn't have back then and I know what little time I have left on this earth.

One of the great things about being where I am in my life is not having the desire to procreate. I wrote about this freedom a while ago when I turned forty-seven. It's a very freeing feeling when you don't really care what men think of you. I'm not out to impress a potential mate any more because I'm done with that biological phase of my life. 

With all this in mind I've created five and thirteen year plans for the things I want to achieve. For these next few years that the kids are in school I want to take in as much art and literature as I can and in turn I also want to create as much as possible. I want to write earnestly and I want to complete a few books, not just this one. I have more personal goals and I want to dream big. I want to be like Grandma Moses and other people who have successfully achieved their goals in the last half of their life. Those people inspire me and are my heroes. 

However, in order to do any of these things successfully I need to be sure I'm around long enough to do them. Exercise and eating right have to be the bedrock on which I build the rest of my goals. If I don't have my health it will be harder to achieve my goals. That's a whole other conversation and post, but one I've blogged about several times over the years. All I have to do is read my blogs from 2021 and I'm reminded of all the reasons why I need to do better before I run out of time. 

Speaking of running, I've been physically running a lot for the past year, but I have realized that nothing works as well as riding my Peloton. I had my blood drawn on Friday for some doctor's appointments coming up and I can literally see the difference in some of my counts during the time that I was riding the bike. It's what works for me and I need to stick with what works. Back to the Peloton drawing board!

Either Focus on One Thing or Get Zero Done

The story of my life is that I have to focus on one thing at a time or I will get nothing done. As much as I wish I could juggle several things at once, I've come to accept that I can't. When I was younger, and when the children were little, I could do so much more than I can now. 

My First 5K Run

I did my first 5K Run in my life on May 9 on Mother's Day with my kids, their dad and his girlfriend, my friend Leisa. It was a great American family event and we all went to dinner afterwards. 

Can we take a moment to celebrate me doing a run for the first time EVER in my life? It was the Houston Rodeo Virtual Run. I am so proud of myself and I can't wait to do more and to build myself up to a 10K run. I'll never be a marathon runner, but I'll be happy if I can complete a 10K. Baby steps!

I had been running for the past couple of months with my Peloton app because I wanted to take advantage of the great weather while I could. I know it will be really hot in Houston soon enough and it will be harder to run in the humidity. So when my daughter told me about this virtual 5K run I thought it was great timing. 

After the run, my left ankle, that has given me some problems when clipping in and out of the bike, and when wearing certain high heels, started hurting me a lot. The irony was that it's never hurt me when I walk or run. I decided to give it a break for a few days after the run.

Coincidentally I found out that I was having a home inspection/appraisal the following Saturday, the 15th. Once I knew I had this looming deadline that's all I could think about and focus on. I made a schedule of what I needed to do each day to clean the house. I know... I know... it's not about how clean or dirty my house is. However, I was not going to have the appraiser think to herself, "Not only did she not remodel this house, she is dirty on top of that." 

So did I continue walking and running this past week? No. Two things that make me get off schedule from working out. An injury or illness and having to do something big, like cleaning the house to prepare for this appraisal. 

The good news is I did pace myself with the house project and I completed a few tasks each day. With the help of my daughter Miranda we got everything done in time for the appraisal. The trick with me mentally is to make a list and to set daily goals so I don't get overwhelmed and shut down. That's what I did and I was able to complete the over-all big task. 

Now with that behind me, and with my ankle feeling better, I can start running again. It's always a challenge, but I always do it. I always recommit. That's what I have to keep telling myself in order to continue. This time I'm going to do it sooner than later. 

Another thing that always helps me to focus on my goals, and to take them in baby steps, so that I can complete them, is making lists and using day planner. Some friends can't believe that I still use an old-school paper planner, a FranklinCovey one to be exact, but writing things down is an essential part of my life. When I write things down and I can see my plans down on paper it calms me. 

I have a dashboard page in my planner where I have four different short lists of things I want to get done. At the top of the page are my five main life goals. 

It's hard for me to do all of these at the exact same time and one always falls behind at some point, however this is what I work on balancing. I have come to accept that sometimes I need to take a whole week off from one, like running for example, to get my house in order for something important like an appraisal. And I won't beat myself up when I need to do that.

All of them are equally important to me and here recently I have really been feeling like this novel that I'm working on is going to be very significant in my life. I wish I could be put in a room alone for a weekend with just my Peloton, my weights, my yoga mat and my lap top. I would write, work out, eat, nap and then write some more. 

I've been looking at writing retreats where I can at least have the solitude and I'm really thinking about doing one. I know it's an expense, but it could be an investment that would be worth it it in the end.  I want to isolate myself for an entire weekend to write. I also love the idea of taking an Amtrak trip somewhere, with a sleeper cart, over a weekend to write.

Plans, plans and more plans. So much is hanging on this appraisal that was done yesterday. If I can refinance my house at a lower interest rate then I can do so many other things. For example, I'm so excited about going on vacation in June with the kids and hopefully doing a writing retreat in July. These are my summer goals!

My Two Words for 2018

I have spent the first day of 2018 resting, reading and meditating on my plan for the year. I've meditated a little longer than planned, but it's all good. Things will get done while I'm on vacation this week.

My Harper Lee candle that my beautiful niece Hannah gave me, lit to send me some positive energy to my creativity and writing, The little typewriter because of course, writing

So here are the words for 2018: Evolve and commit. I am evolving. Every year that passes from freeing myself of long held beliefs, I evolve. I am finding my spiritual center. I remember the words I read on my last birthday at Mr. Martin's niche, "to put my trust and faith in my own mind, to live and die free." I am evolving every day to do just that. 

To commit covers SO many things. I want to commit to this evolution, to my spiritual journey, to my health, to my children and to my career. I am committed.

2017 was a challenging year in many ways but I also have A LOT to be grateful for. I read through my happiness jar and I was reminded of all the wonderful things that happened this past year, like my kids are alive and well, despite an illness. I'm grateful for our amazing summer trip to Germany, a new roof over our heads, and so much more.

So WELCOME 2018. I have faith in you. I believe that this will be a good year and one of the best in a long long time. 

My Inner Journey, new Goals, new Novel

Things don't always go like we wish they would. It's so easy to get caught up on the idea that a certain thing, job, house, relationship, is going to make everything different in your life and bring you happiness. But like the Rolling Stones say, "You can't always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, you'll get what you need."

One of my newest fascinations are sacred hearts and milagros. From Casa Ramirez in the Heights.

When we don't get something that we think we really really want, we have to think, "Did I really need that thing OR can I create MY OWN ven diagram in life?" You know, what is your perfect spot? What you love, what pays well, what you're good at - these three things intersected create a #WIN.  Can we just do the things that make us happy to create that #WIN for ourselves? That is what I'm pondering on this weekend.

I've set new goals for myself and some things have already fallen into place. First of all. I love my industry and I love what we do. I know that. I love that every day people in our city pick up a newspaper or turns on their computer to read the words that my newspaper has written and that by selling the ads around those stories I too have had a part in that. If you don't believe that people still read the newspaper, know this, the Houston Chronicle and chron.com reach 1.8 million readers on ONE Sunday. Yes, I am a part of something huge and I get paid to do it. My goal is to make more money doing that this year. More money always adds to my happiness.

I feel like my whole life I keep doing things that take me astray from writing. I make myself go astray starting new projects and always being busy. I am going to start concentrating on writing again and I have an idea for a really great novel. I'm already writing the outline and the characterization charts. I can't share the topic yet but it's going to be a really good one and I'm very excited.

I also love social media and all of the marketing aspects behind it. It's changed the way we communicate and even the way we share news. I'm really excited to take over as the volunteer of the social media for my daughter's lacrosse team. It's going to be great experience and part of my continued self-education. This is something that just came up for me unexpectedly, but just at the right time.

Then there's my inner journey. I just heard that term again yesterday and I thought about what a perfect description that is for my spiritual journey. I'm at a crossroads in life. I don't believe in organized religion, but I do believe in spirituality. (I feel like this topic deserves its own post so I may do a longer one about this later.) I've recently become fascinated with sacred hearts, milagros, old churches and women saints.

I'm on an inner journey right now, combining all the things that I believe in. I have an ad in today's Belief section for an event next Saturday. It's hosted by an organization called Brigid's Place. It's a "service of music and mediation that celebrates the voices of the women who loved Jesus — Mary the Mother, the woman at the well, the woman who anointed Jesus, Mary of Bethany, and Mary Magdalene." It sounds so beautiful to me and I told the organizers that it reminds me of St. Fabiola and my intrigue with her and the Fabiola Project.  I'm really interested in women saints as people and what they did. I'm not necessarily interested in the Catholic religion because it's an organized religion. I'm more interested in the stories and the spiritual aspect of a lot of things.

So there you are. I am going to pursue things that I'm passionate about in life- making bonus, writing, running, social media, bringing order to my life/house and exploring my inner journey. I am going to create my own ven diagram.

My Words for 2016

A friend of mine gave me this idea a couple of years ago. We choose either one or more words to define our goals for the year. We started doing this when she moved back to Houston from Savannah and this is our third year doing it. It's become a tradition now!

A clean desk after a good house cleaning the day after Christmas, part of clearing the clutter!

This year I've decided not to set any wordy goals at all. I'm only going to use the three words that will be my guide for all things. These three words can act separately, but they can also overlap. I'll define them for the purposes of this blog post only.

Healthy-  This means both physical health as well as mental health. I want to work on clearing the baggage I still carry from childhood and along the way.

Clarity- Clarity of mind and well as soul. This also relates to clearing my life of clutter and goes hand in hand with my mental health.

Liberty- I choose freedom from all things that bring me down, whether they are food, clutter, organized religion, fear, people or the negative voices in my own head.

The older I am getting the less tolerant I'm becoming of people and things that I don't appreciate. I'm still learning to say no and telling people that certain behaviors, like coming to my house unannounced, are not okay. It's my right to say no and I will. Here is to a happy and prosperous 2016!

End of Year Recap

Before I Die wall in Midtown Houston.

This is the year that I have blogged the least out of any year since I started this blog 11 years ago.

Here is recap of how many blog posts I have written every year. 2004 doesn't count because that's the year I started the blog and I started it at the end of the year.

Blog Archive

·    ►  2015 (16)

·    ►  2014 (35)

·    ►  2013 (39)

·    ►  2012 (29)

·    ►  2011 (42)

·    ►  2010 (47)

·    ►  2009 (60)

·    ►  2008 (207)

·    ►  2007 (150)

·    ►  2006 (176)

·    ►  2005 (142)

·    ►  2004 (13)

I wonder what was happening in 2008 that I was able to blog 207 times!  2006 was also a busy blogging year. I will do better in 2016. I’m going to set a goal to blog at least 52 times, or once a week on average.

I have several creative ideas for 2016, as usual. Part of me doesn’t want to set any goals for 2016. I hate disappointing myself, but I know I can’t do that. I have to set goals whether I reach them or I don’t, just like I have monthly revenue goals at work. I need some direction on where I’m going in life.

One big goal that is going to be made simple is to do what I need to do to live longer. Simple. If eating chips is not what I should be doing to live longer then maybe I shouldn’t eat too many chips. If I should start exercising regularly so I can live longer then maybe I should exercise more.

My other main goals are going to be about me and finding my center and getting back to the financial place where I need to be. Once I’m financially sound I can fix things around my house that need fixing. I can afford to eat clean, which is something I want to do. I want to do what I did in 2014 when I lost around 10 pounds from just eating clean and not drinking.

I also need to think about my word or words for 2016. What word will describe what I want to achieve this next year? That will be my topic for my next blog.

Finally but most important. What do I want to accomplish before I die? (See photo at the top) It will be here pretty soon, whether I die form a tragedy, an accident or bad genes and bad health, it's out there! And we don't know when it can happen. I saw on Facebook that a friend from high school was very sick. Her daughter posted about it and it seemed that it was serious. Like she was almost dying. She pulled through and when I finally got to email with her to see what had happened she told me that she went in for knee surgery and the next day she passed out from too much anesthesia and didn't wake up for six days! Just like that! Thank God she did wake up and she can talk about it. We do not know when our moment may arrive.

So that's the other thing I want to really think about in 2016. I want to make a bucket list for the last half of my life. I want to live like I'm leaving soon and I want to get the most out of appreciating art, literature, writing and making my own art and literature. I want to help my kids become successful teenagers. What do you want to do before you die?

New Year, Awesome Stuff, & Goals

So here I am. It's hard to believe that a whole year has passed already and that all my old issues are the same issues I have today. It's hard to believe that I feel like I didn't accomplish anything in my personal and professional life. I saw this idea floating around Facebook and Pinterest at the end of the year and it got me to thinking that maybe this is what I need to do this year.

Why? Because I think I forget all the good things that happened in 2012. I'm sure that I accomplished something this past year. I still have a roof over my head, my children are healthy, I have an interesting job, I accomplished something with Seth to help him in school, (more on that later) I have great friends and sisters and I met a lot of interesting characters along the way.

This is one of those years when I don't feel like setting any goals but I know I have to. Who cares if the goals are the same ones I set last year? Zig Ziglar said we have to have goals.

He says in his CD How to Get What You Want: “The great majority of people are “wandering generalities” rather than “meaningful specifics”. The fact is that you can't hit a target that you can't see. If you don't know where you are going, you will probably end up somewhere else. You have to have goals.”

So I ask myself do I want to be a wandering generality or do I want to be a meaningful specific? This past year I think I was wandering more than I was specific. I think I was just survival mode just doing what I had to do to keep my sanity and to keep my kids fed and healthy.

This coming year I plan on being a meaningful specific in all aspects of my life but especially professionally and personally. I have a great book brewing inside me but unless I write it I'm just a wandering generality.

I know what I need to do. It's already January 5th. It's time I sit down and set those goals and commit them to writing.

I loved this idea too. I found these pages on this website. Download them while they're still available. Let's set our goals for the year.

My Aha! Moment at 42

Today is the second day of my 42nd year and I'm just now getting to writing down my goals for this year. I've talked about my goals but I really wrote them down this time- the things that I want to accomplish in my 42nd year of life. In writing them down I wrote one in particular that I write every single year and I think those of you who know me know what that goal is. To write a new novel of course.

www.annetaintor.com

As I wrote down the goal to write I had an aha! moment. Something that I already knew at the back of my mind, but that I had never been honest enough to really think about. Since my divorce, or even since my separation, I have been wasting precious writing time. I could have really been writing all these weekends that are my free weekends.

I thought about it again today when I read this piece I wrote for Literary Mama four years ago. I used to long for that time to write when the children were young. Now that I have this time without them, and all to myself I'm totally taking it for granted, the way I took my 20s for granted.

I've been so wrapped up in my emotions, in my loss, in my drama, that I've been searching for something that I can only find within. It's like I'm searching for validation or affirmation when I already know the answer. I know I'm an awesome and interesting person. I have a great education, an extremely interesting job at a company that I love, I'm well-traveled, well-read, I'm passionate, very smart and apparently I'm still sexy and attractive.

The truth is, I don't need for someone to tell me any of these things. I know myself. I don't need to be wasting my time or my life looking for validation. So one of my goals for my 42nd year is to stop doing that.

If I can stop wasting my time on trivial and mundane things then I can start using my free weekends for more intellectual things. These are my weekends for goodness sake and I'm wasting precious time! From now on on my free weekends I'm writing or feeding my mind intellectually. At least during the day and I will break for dinner and evening events that are worthy of my time.

That was my Aha! moment this weekend. (a la O Magazine) It took this weekend all alone and really pondering on my life and goals to realize this, or rather to be honest with myself. There are other things on my goal list like running with the kids, eating better (always on the list), making more money, remodeling the house, and the spiritual, but writing is definitely at the top of my list.

End of the Year Recap

I did a pretty thorough recap of the year on skirt.com, so I thought I’d do the same for Shoegirl Corner, since this is my original blog and my baby. One day soon I will start my own website away from blogger, ShoegirlCorner.com. I’ve owned the rights to that name for a while, but I’d like to take a website building class so I can work on my site myself.

The year started out slow on ShoeGirl Corner since I was still blogging for Hips ‘n Salsa. It was a good effort, but not successful. I didn’t blog at all in January and then blogged on average once a month, but at the end of March I thought I could pull off three blogs. I started blogging more through April. I blogged about: getting my first mammogram, purchasing shoes and art, lost remotes and the differences between men and women.


The summer wore on and I realized that I was in a funk. I blogged about it more than once on Shoegirl Corner and on skirt. Now that I look back at both blogs I realize what a bad year 2010 was for me- personally, professionally, financially, and writing wise. The only good part of the year was that I kept writing and the health of my family. I feel like I spent most of 2010 reminding myself that things weren’t that bad and that they could be worse. I taught my daughter to tell me what my husband tells me, “At least we have the money to pay for it” rather than to lament that we didn’t have any money.


Some time in April people started commenting on my blog in Chinese. I reasoned that they were either Chinese spies or they were people who were trying to communicate with one another in communist China and they were using my blog as a channel. They only stayed for a few months and they either found a better channel or they were discovered and had to leave my blog. I was sad to see them go.
 
As the year wore on I gained more weight and I realized that I have food and cupcake issues. Okay, I rediscovered this. I finally set some goals for myself and I shared my vision board on my Shoegirl Corner blog too. I shared my goals with the world to help me become more accountable.



At the end of the year I feel like things started to take a turn for the better. I went to my beloved New York for business and stayed over the weekend and did some things I didn't do last time, like walking across the Brooklyn Bridge and going to Coney Island.

I started working out on a regular basis. I’ve gone ten weeks straight working out on average three times a week, sometimes more, until I had surgery on the last week of the year. I’ve worked out many times before off and on but this is the first time I think I worked out so many times consecutively. It was a turning point for me. What made it even easier to do was that Rey has been working out too. He has been so happy with his results that he decided to start training for a triathlon. Having him work on a goal to get healthy too has made it a lifestyle for me instead of a chore.

I feel like I ended the year on a good note. I even got a Kindle for $6 and now I can have the experience of reading books electronically first hand. I think that’s important if I’m really going to publish my novel electronically in 2011. I had surgery to correct a little feminine issue that I had and hopefully that’s all fixed now.

I’m looking forward to 2011 whatever it may bring in. I say, "Bring It!" It can not be worse than 2010. Anything that happens will be for the best. I need to get out of my comfort zone. I need to shake things up a bit.

I learned an important lesson this year and that was that it is important to write down my goals. (something I already knew but didn't do for some reason) I will work on spiritual, personal, family and on my writing goals in 2011- all the things on my Vision Board. See you all around next year!

Starting Over

How many times do we start over in our lives? Thousands probably. I don't just mean big life altering start overs, like starting a new job or getting remarried. There are a lot of times that we start over with smaller things, like with our goals or an exercise routine. Today the kids go back to their after school program down the street from my gym. I'm back on my regular exercise schedule starting today. I pick them up and stop a the gym for at least 45 minutes 3-4 times a week. Do over! Let's see how I do.

Here is the vision board that I created for my goals. You can read more about it on skirt! There is a picture of the first version on there, but this is the final version.

Out of My Comfort Zone and Off My Butt

Lately I've been resorting to only writing lunch time blogs. I don’t know how that happened but it did. I don’t know what happened to my writing in general, both in blogging and in trying to write creatively. It, like many other things in my life, has taken a giant detour. Not that I’ve wanted for them to do that, but they have. Life is very strange like that. Sometimes you are living your life, doing all that you can when suddenly things take a sudden and unexpected turn.

Most recently this was true of my job. Things changed and my cheese was moved, yet again. But I’ve been in my industry long enough to expect that change. The thing is that like other things in my life my life was going a certain direction for so long that I didn’t want to get out of my comfort zone to change it.

I received a Master’s in Communication NINE (yes, nine) years ago and I planned on pursuing a career more in that direction. That didn’t happen. I was offered a different position within this company and I took it and I really enjoyed it. It was somewhat along the lines of what I had studied in many ways. I dealt with a lot of organizational communication. Then five years ago I received a promotion and even though I wasn’t thrilled about what they were asking me to do, I took it and I made the best of it. It was not related to project management or communicating with the entire organization like my former position.

So what now? I finally decided to have my resume re-written professionally. That was a big step for me. The company I used did such an awesome job. So there you go. I got out of my comfort zone and did one thing to shake things up a bit. I believe that everyone, whether they are looking or not, should have a fresh updated resume at their fingertips at all times. And I also believe that everyone should have their resume out there. It’s just called being prepared and realistic in this economy and especially in our industry. And that’s what I plan to do.

On to other subjects and back to writing. I need to do something to jump start my writing. I can never concentrate on more than a couple of areas of my life at one time. I’ve been working out pretty regularly for a while now, so I’m doing well there. But whenever I work out I stop writing and vise versa. What a vicious cycle! I’m also lacking in some other areas of my life that will remain unmentioned. I know what they are and I need to work on them. I desperately need to cut out the things in my life that are eating my time.

Summer is here! I need to get the kids registered for summer programs and I need to get on a summer "work-out/writing/spiritual/teaching the children" schedule for myself.

That is my goal for the summer. To get my life back on track in all areas that I am lacking. I need to literally get off my butt! What are your summer goals?

Turning 40 Reflections

Design by Anne Taintor

I'm still four months away from turning 40 and yet I find that I have really been reflecting on my life and what I've done thus far. What's scary about that is that I am still four months away and I wonder how I'll react when I finally do hit the big 4-0, technically the half way point of my life. Since my mom died at 69 and my dad is still alive at 85, forty is a good average age of my half way point.

Several of my friends turn forty this year too. My cousin, who was my closest childhood friend, turns 40 in a couple of weeks. My childhood best friend turned 40 in August and my elementary school best friend turns 40 this month. My middle school-college best friend turns 40 in December. Another middle school-college friend is having a big group birthday party with a bunch of friends who all turned 40 in 2009.

Lately I'm really interested in all my friends who are turning 40. I wonder how they are all taking this milestone. I wonder what they are really thinking and feeling. Are they freaked out or are they taking it in stride?

I think that what's freaking me out the most is that I feel like I still have so much I haven't done. I feel selfish saying this sometimes because I have done more than a lot of people and I completely appreciate this. I have two beautiful brilliant children and a husband who loves me. I've traveled a lot. I have an interesting job and I work for an exciting company and other things for which I am thankful. And yes I am thankful, but I don't think there's anything wrong with wanting more.

In the next four months I will be revising my goals and I will be really thinking about what I still want out of life. Writing plays a big part of it and will continue to play a big part of my future until I really give it the time that it deserves. I'm going to revise the timeline attached to each of those goals. The top of the list after writing will be my health and my home. I need to make a decision regarding this house. Will I remodel or rebuild? Once and for all I need to decide.

I think we should all take the time at least once a year to review our goals. I usually do mine at the end of the year and then review them again on my birthday in February.

In the past week I have taken two really thought provoking tests. One was the StrenthsFinder 2.0 test, which I was encouraged to take at work. StrengthsFinder 2.0 says my Top 5 Strenghts are: Communication, Learner, Activator, Woo, and Input. Woo means I love the challenge of meeting new people and winning them over. Activator means I'm impatient for action. Input and Learner both have to do with my love for learning and archiving what I learn. And well, Communication is pretty self explanatory. I am the master communicator. It even says that I am comfortable admitting "all sorts of things" about myself. I guess that's why I'm a blogger and a writer.

A few days ago I also took the life purpose test in the November issue of O Magazine. The test is "Who Are You Meant to Be? Self Assessment Test." My highest score was in Style #3- Striving to be Creative. I was not surprised by that response. What was funny was that FOUR areas all tied for second place. These were: Recognized, Spontaneous, Knowledgeable, and Secure.

Now I'm going to take all these latest finding about myself and I'm going to think about how they fit into my new goals for 40+.

When I was twenty-five my older sister died of cancer. She was only forty-two. Now I am about to be forty and I realize even more how fragile life can be.

Henry David Thoreau said, "Live the life you have imagined." Are you?

So, what are your goals for the coming year? What have you accomplished in your life?

New Year & Goals

It's a new year and one of my goals is to write more and to try to get published more. I was very proud to get my first feature story on Gwendolyn Zepeda published on skirt! Houston this week. I'm also still blogging on the national and local page pretty frequently.

I am going to write more and submit more in 2009. That is my writing goal, among many others. Goals always make me feel like I'm moving forward. That's what keeps me motivated. Lists of goals and lists in general. I have a daily "To Do" list and of course a yearly one too.

In addition to that, the beginning of a year also means another birthday for me in February. THE BIG 39 this time. I don't celebrate birthdays however it's like the beginning of a new year. I take stock of my life at that time and I may even revise the goals I made at the beginning of the year.

Yesterday, on the anniversary of my mom's death, but not because it was her anniversary, I made turkey. Ironically the last time and only time I ever made a turkey was right before she passed away. I made it because she didn't feel well enough to do it herself any more.

I didn't think about her when we were having the turkey, but now that I thought about it it's really funny that I made turkey on the anniversary of her death.

My mom raised me with a very healthy belief in death, so I think that's why I can see the irony and humor in the coincidence. I know that she's fine and resting now. I also believe that I will see her again one day and that makes it all okay.

On another note, check out the story by my cousin Oscar Casares in the December issue of Texas Monthly.

New Year New Goals

I have gone nine days into the year without once mentioning that obviously this is a new year. And obviously one of my goals for 2008 is to lose weight. However, I do have other goals in addition to this one.

This is the year of passion. This year I will make it my goal to do what makes me happy. Obviously my true passion is to write full time, but that's not going to happen. SO if I am going to continue my career in advertising, like I have for the past 19 years, I am only going to do what makes me feel passion.

Around 4 years ago I learned something very interesting about myself. I get really turned on by project management. I've been in advertising sales for a long time, but five or six years ago I became a coordinator. Soon I moved from simply coordinating special sections and special projects to managing a much larger project from the ground up.

I found myself completely in my element. I loved taking a project from nothing and building on it until it became something. In my case it was the creation and launch of a new publication, La Vibra, our weekend entertainment section. I loved bringing all the departments in the Chronicle together to create something. Ironically at the same time that I felt like I was giving birth to La Vibra I was also literally giving birth to my son.

Anyway, I want to capture that feeling again. I want to feel the same passion that I did when I launched La Vibra or when I worked on some other large special sections. That is another one of my goals for this year.

I have a bunch of other boring ones that I won't share here. They have to do with fixing my house and more novel stuff.