Where Did 2022 Go? Hello 2023!

At the end of each year I usually do a recap and talk about the blogs I wrote. I didn't do that this time. But if I had written one, it would have been the shortest one... I only wrote six blog posts the entire year. The least I've ever written. I wrote ten in 2021. So I'm not going to bother recapping a year that flew by. It was a year that I've been planning for a good while because I knew I was going to become an empty nester. I kind of just eased into this new lifestyle in the fall, doing more in the community, attending events, but I have big plans for 2023.

For starters, I began the year with 21 days of positive manifestation exercises. I wrote them out on these dashboards for my planner. I took out all the old dashboards and I started the year with fresh new pages. 

I was reading back on blog entries from seven years ago and I set six and seven year plans for preparing the kids to be ready to go off to school. They did in fact go out of state like I predicted, so I'm alone while they're in school in New York.

Now I'm setting new seven and twelve year plans for myself. In seven years I'll be sixty!! (That blows my mind!) And in twelve years I'll be sixty-five, retirement age. I'm actively working on all the things that I need to accomplish in order to be healthy and ready for retirement. I do not want to get to the end of this road of working my whole life only to find that I have illnesses that keep me from doing the things I want to do. 

Just to be clear, I am realistic enough to realize that sometimes the Universe has different plans for us and there are some illnesses that are inevitable. We can't do anything about those. I'm talking about the illnesses that I CAN avoid by being mindful and balanced about what I eat and how much I exercise. 

What are some of my plans for retirement? I'm going to yell some of my ideas out to the universe or the interwebs! 

1. I want to really give my writing the time that it deserves. I want to actively work on sending my work out to literary magazines and working on novels I want to write. These are things that I can start doing now that I'm an empty-nester and I've claimed back so many hours in my life. 

2. I want to buy a renovated vintage trailer and a small pickup truck for my retirement and travel around Texas and neighboring states with it. 

3. I'd like to live in a different European country three months at a time. Maybe three months there and come home for three months. This idea is still very preliminary. Ideas for countries? Spain of course, Italy, France and Greece. Maybe countries in the UK, but I need to visit first.

So what are the things I'm doing in the next few years to prepare for retirement? Some of the same old song and dance. Eat right, exercise and write. Write, write, write. I can only get where I want by writing, like a musician practices their instrument. 

I want to go visit the spots I'm thinking of living in and I need to start budgeting how much rent will cost, etc... Then start working on a plan for how I'm going to pay for my retirement besides social security, 401K and my pension. I'm sitting on a nice little nest egg right now (house and land) and that's a whole other decision in itself. 

My word for 2023 is "Balance." It's a year of practicing balance in everything I do. No overeating or overindulging, no overspending, taking care of myself, writing and traveling when I can, both domestically and internationally. It's also the year my girl graduates from college so there's a big New York trip in May for her graduation and to get Seth packed up for the summer. I love New York!

Always keeping in mind that, "life is what happens when you're making plans." Cheers to a great 2023!

Ten Year Recap of ShoeGirl Corner Blogs

We are at the end of 2019 and some debate whether it's the end of a decade or not. Technically the end of the decade will be December 31, 2020 but since I was born in 1970 and I've always referred to each decade as the 70s, 80s, 90s, etc. I'm going to treat this as the first end of the decade. The end of the 2010s and I'm going to recap the last ten years, looking at the last blog of each year.

My Favorite Quote of the Decade

Apparently 2010 was a tough year. I can't remember exactly why, but I know that my marriage was coming to an end around that time even though I didn't say it. https://shoegirlcorner.blogspot.com/2010/12/end-of-year-recap.html

2011 was not a good blogging year. By the end of that year I was divorced but not talking about it yet. It was definitely a turning point in my life. https://shoegirlcorner.blogspot.com/2011/12/lazy-blog.html

In 2012 I didn't even bother to do an end of  the year recap. My last blog was in October! I know 2012 was an interesting year because that's when I was single for the first time and I dated. I just didn't blog about it.  https://shoegirlcorner.blogspot.com/2012/10/my-first-blogger-conference-im-such.html

December's blog in 2013 was a really good recap of the year and what I had been up to. That's the year I took a break from the Chronicle and when my dad came to live with me. https://shoegirlcorner.blogspot.com/2013/12/new-year-is-almost-here.html

It seems like 2014 is around the time I started becoming more aware of getting older as I got closer to my 45th birthday. https://shoegirlcorner.blogspot.com/2014/12/another-year-passes-us-by.html

2015 is when I started asking the question:  What do I want to accomplish before I die? https://shoegirlcorner.blogspot.com/2015/12/end-of-year-recap.html

2016 was one of those years when I didn't even blog in December. My last blog was in October and it was about raising successful Latino kids. This is when I started counting down the years that I had left with them https://shoegirlcorner.blogspot.com/2016/10/raising-latino-male-and-female.html  The blog in August was actually more introspective.  https://shoegirlcorner.blogspot.com/2016/08/when-i-was-young-and-single-my-mother.html

It's funny that I ended 2017 with another blog about the kids and my advice to parents about the Vanguard and Magnet school programs. My next to last blog was more of a recap on the year and things that I was grateful for. https://shoegirlcorner.blogspot.com/2017/12/a-roof-over-our-heads-other-things.html

2018 was a tough year. My father passed away in February, right around my 48th birthday. This is what I said about that year: Here I am on the eve of New Year's Eve reflecting on a really hard year that came with sadness, pain, but also gifts and blessings.  https://shoegirlcorner.blogspot.com/2018/12/end-of-year-recap.html

Which leads me to the end of 2019. This has been a really great year! I've been blessed beyond measure with my career, my kids and my personal growth. I've had a great boss and great accounts.

I went to New York three times this year. Once to visit LIU with Miranda, another to take her to school and then for Thanksgiving. I went to Vegas for my 49th birthday in February and had a blast. I took the kids to LA in the summer to visit their cousins and the babies.

Miranda graduated from DeBakey and received a huge scholarship from LIU. I de-cluttered my house a lot. I still have a lot of work to do but it's a huge difference and has made me feel so much better. Especially my bedroom! I'm working hard on making sure Seth is growing up to be a good man and finishes strong at DeBakey too.

Spiritually I'm on a great journey of finding my peace. I call it My Inner Journey . I'm in a good place and I'm very fortunate to have what I do. I'm really working on "taking ownership of my freed self." I started a project that I love called Little Libraries in Laundromats. I have four little libraries in laundromats in my neighborhood and doing this really feeds my soul.

2020 is a significant year for me because I turn 50. I'm planning another trip to Vegas and this time I plan to party a little harder. I want to see Gwen Stefani and I want to spend more time down in the slot machines in the casino. I want to have that "casino" experience. So far that's the only trip planned for the year. I may go to New York again for Thanksgiving but there's still time to plan. I plan on making my last 1/3 of my life count! I'm looking forward to what 2020 will bring!

My Two Words for 2018

I have spent the first day of 2018 resting, reading and meditating on my plan for the year. I've meditated a little longer than planned, but it's all good. Things will get done while I'm on vacation this week.

My Harper Lee candle that my beautiful niece Hannah gave me, lit to send me some positive energy to my creativity and writing, The little typewriter because of course, writing

So here are the words for 2018: Evolve and commit. I am evolving. Every year that passes from freeing myself of long held beliefs, I evolve. I am finding my spiritual center. I remember the words I read on my last birthday at Mr. Martin's niche, "to put my trust and faith in my own mind, to live and die free." I am evolving every day to do just that. 

To commit covers SO many things. I want to commit to this evolution, to my spiritual journey, to my health, to my children and to my career. I am committed.

2017 was a challenging year in many ways but I also have A LOT to be grateful for. I read through my happiness jar and I was reminded of all the wonderful things that happened this past year, like my kids are alive and well, despite an illness. I'm grateful for our amazing summer trip to Germany, a new roof over our heads, and so much more.

So WELCOME 2018. I have faith in you. I believe that this will be a good year and one of the best in a long long time. 

New Year and New Word

The truth of the matter is this. My life has been a big disorganized mess for far too long. I'm one of those people that can't do too many things at one time. I can only really do one event or activity per day, unless I'm traveling for fun or work. When I'm traveling for work I can make several sales calls in a day. When I'm traveling for fun I can visit several places in the same day too. It's not the same when it comes to doing things I need to do for the house.

by Rose Khan

What I share on social media is what makes me the happiest and the proudest- mostly my kids, my friends and shoes. A lot of my energy goes to them, taking care of my dad, and my career. In my book, happiness, education, feeding my brain and the brain of my children, way outweighs anything material. I even half kid on Facebook all the time about my disorderly house and that I'm not much of a homemaker.

Therefore, the only word I can think of for 2017 is "Order." I need more order in my life and I feel like the word order covers everything. Order in my home, health, finances, children, work. I want to lead a more orderly life, without losing my eccentric traits I also value. That's the tricky part!

I like to think of myself as part artist and how many artists can you think of who lead orderly lives? Not too many! Think of Tyler Durden and the Narrator's house in "Fight Club," and Michael Caine's house in "Children of Men," all packed with books and papers. That's my house.

I'm not really religious these days but I am a spiritual person. I believe a lot in karma and doing good so that good comes back to you. I think there's some truth to decluttering your life in order to open it up to good things, a little feng shui. I'm starting off my year with a clean slate.

My first step towards inviting more "order" into my life is to clear out my house of all junk and clutter. In early December I prepared for this project by cleaning out the garage. The garage is the "holding place" for me to put all the clutter and to work from there. I have to do this or I will get overwhelmed by the house and I'll end up doing nothing at all. Every two months when it's heavy trash day again I'll clean out the garage of anything I know I don't need or want for sure.

I want to follow suit with my health and cleaning out all the bad things from my diet. I'm going to start running again before it gets really hot again and I'm getting financial things in order because I have some goals I can only achieve by doing that.

2017 is going to be a year of "Order" and I'm starting now. What is your word(s) for 2017?

My Words for 2016

A friend of mine gave me this idea a couple of years ago. We choose either one or more words to define our goals for the year. We started doing this when she moved back to Houston from Savannah and this is our third year doing it. It's become a tradition now!

A clean desk after a good house cleaning the day after Christmas, part of clearing the clutter!

This year I've decided not to set any wordy goals at all. I'm only going to use the three words that will be my guide for all things. These three words can act separately, but they can also overlap. I'll define them for the purposes of this blog post only.

Healthy-  This means both physical health as well as mental health. I want to work on clearing the baggage I still carry from childhood and along the way.

Clarity- Clarity of mind and well as soul. This also relates to clearing my life of clutter and goes hand in hand with my mental health.

Liberty- I choose freedom from all things that bring me down, whether they are food, clutter, organized religion, fear, people or the negative voices in my own head.

The older I am getting the less tolerant I'm becoming of people and things that I don't appreciate. I'm still learning to say no and telling people that certain behaviors, like coming to my house unannounced, are not okay. It's my right to say no and I will. Here is to a happy and prosperous 2016!

Fist Day of the Year Thoughts

Last night one of my best friends asked me if I had written down my goals for 2015 yet. She said that she's writing hers down and that she remembers that I always say that we should do that. I told her I was going to do it today and that I have been thinking about my words for 2015. The first word that comes to mind that sums it all up is "Intention." It comes from a great quote/meme that I found on Pinterest a while back.

This is so me! The live from habit part. I get so comfortable in my old habits, being a semi-hoarder, not cleaning thoroughly, just on the surface, procrastinating, not wanting to be bothered with some socially acceptable behaviors and the list goes on. Probably things that many of you who know me didn't know about me. Only those closest to me know what a wreck my house is or about the boxes stacked by the back door that I brought home from my dad's house a year and a half ago. I'm yet to go through them and yes, they are my mother's junk from years and years. I got that terrible habit from her and I cultivated it.

This year I promise to live from INTENTION. I have to intentionally do things in order to get them done. I can't pretend otherwise. Everything I do right takes effort.

Which leads me to this wonderful list of 42 good habits to make me better. I love that this list uses the word "habits" too like the meme about living more from intention. There are bad habits and there are good habits. I know that I can't do them all so I've chosen fifteen of them that I can do. I'll choose my words for 2015 from here.

Now to write down those specific goals and my words.

New Year is Almost Here

We are two and a half days to 2014. Yep, seriously. I posted this image recently on my Facebook page. I think it's a very appropriate statement for 2014.

Image by Anne Taintor.

I also posted another one telling 2013 thank you for all the lessons and that I'm ready for 2014. I am. I think 2013 taught me its fair share of lessons and I'm done. I know what I want for 2014 and I'm going to go for it.

This was an amazing year, with the good, the bad, and the ugly. I took a HUGE leap of faith in May when I left the Chronicle. I like to think that in the words of Brene Brown I "dared greatly." I did what she says, "What's worth doing even if you fail?" I say this because I did it all on faith without any idea if this would work.

I am building my new business Casares Communications, that has evolved into a media rep company, and I am working on my writing.

I would love to say that I am writing full time but then that wouldn't be realistic either. I have to do something to make money to pay my bills and to take care of my children and I love the freedom of owning my own company and creating my own revenue.

So for the past six months and really more so in the last three months, I have been working on building a business where I can make money but that also gives me the freedom to be here for my kids, my dad and my writing, in that order.

One of my goals for 2014 is to make that business a real success and to make it profitable. I'm not asking to be a millionaire. All I want is to make enough money to cover my expenses, to feed my kids and to pay for my health insurance.

Another thing I did in 2013 was take a wonderful one week vacation with my kids. We went to Washington DC, Philadelphia and New York. It was a great experience they won't easily forget.

At the end of 2013 I tackled my novel again. I hired a wonderful editor who has been helping me edit it in order to get it ready for electronic publication. This is a novel that I started working on in 1996 and that I finished around 2005. Yes, eight years ago approximately. I finished it and then it just sat there forever. I was so excited to find someone as passionate about it as I was and so willing to edit it with me. I am forever in debt to her for encouraging me to do this, just by her interest. That in itself encouraged me so much.

So 2013, you've been good to me in many ways. Thank you for the freedom that I have had to spend time with the kids and with my father. Thank you for the courage to leave my job of 16 years for freedom. I feel like my mind has been freed in so many ways.

And thank you for the lessons. For the lessons in patience, forgiveness and letting go. I have another image by Kelly Rae Roberts that I love and I have to share here. This is me. I have to learn to just let it go.

 

An ex co-worker and one time teammate passed away last Monday, right as we drew near to the end of 2013. She lived life so richly and so fully. She was so ambitious and she reached for her professional goals, while still having fun and finding love again. I want to remember that about her. She lost her life at only 47 and it reminded me of my sister losing her life to cancer at only 42.

 

Ironically, I worked with Janice at the time that my sister was diagnosed and was going through chemotherapy. That was the first time that I had an "Aha" moment in my life and the first time that I left the Chronicle. Now that Janice passed away I remembered Hilda. It was a reminder that we must live life to its fullest and with no regrets.

 

That's what 2014 is going to be about. Letting go, having no regrets, living fully, writing novels and making my business profitable. Everything else will fall into place.

New Year, Awesome Stuff, & Goals

So here I am. It's hard to believe that a whole year has passed already and that all my old issues are the same issues I have today. It's hard to believe that I feel like I didn't accomplish anything in my personal and professional life. I saw this idea floating around Facebook and Pinterest at the end of the year and it got me to thinking that maybe this is what I need to do this year.

Why? Because I think I forget all the good things that happened in 2012. I'm sure that I accomplished something this past year. I still have a roof over my head, my children are healthy, I have an interesting job, I accomplished something with Seth to help him in school, (more on that later) I have great friends and sisters and I met a lot of interesting characters along the way.

This is one of those years when I don't feel like setting any goals but I know I have to. Who cares if the goals are the same ones I set last year? Zig Ziglar said we have to have goals.

He says in his CD How to Get What You Want: “The great majority of people are “wandering generalities” rather than “meaningful specifics”. The fact is that you can't hit a target that you can't see. If you don't know where you are going, you will probably end up somewhere else. You have to have goals.”

So I ask myself do I want to be a wandering generality or do I want to be a meaningful specific? This past year I think I was wandering more than I was specific. I think I was just survival mode just doing what I had to do to keep my sanity and to keep my kids fed and healthy.

This coming year I plan on being a meaningful specific in all aspects of my life but especially professionally and personally. I have a great book brewing inside me but unless I write it I'm just a wandering generality.

I know what I need to do. It's already January 5th. It's time I sit down and set those goals and commit them to writing.

I loved this idea too. I found these pages on this website. Download them while they're still available. Let's set our goals for the year.

New Year New Goals

I have gone nine days into the year without once mentioning that obviously this is a new year. And obviously one of my goals for 2008 is to lose weight. However, I do have other goals in addition to this one.

This is the year of passion. This year I will make it my goal to do what makes me happy. Obviously my true passion is to write full time, but that's not going to happen. SO if I am going to continue my career in advertising, like I have for the past 19 years, I am only going to do what makes me feel passion.

Around 4 years ago I learned something very interesting about myself. I get really turned on by project management. I've been in advertising sales for a long time, but five or six years ago I became a coordinator. Soon I moved from simply coordinating special sections and special projects to managing a much larger project from the ground up.

I found myself completely in my element. I loved taking a project from nothing and building on it until it became something. In my case it was the creation and launch of a new publication, La Vibra, our weekend entertainment section. I loved bringing all the departments in the Chronicle together to create something. Ironically at the same time that I felt like I was giving birth to La Vibra I was also literally giving birth to my son.

Anyway, I want to capture that feeling again. I want to feel the same passion that I did when I launched La Vibra or when I worked on some other large special sections. That is another one of my goals for this year.

I have a bunch of other boring ones that I won't share here. They have to do with fixing my house and more novel stuff.