Falling in Love with Fellow Prisoners by Gwendolyn Zepeda

A few years ago before Gwendolyn Zepeda was Houston's Poet Laureate I heard her read at Inprint's First Friday. I've pretty much followed Gwen Zepeda's writing since I read about her in the Houston Press and attended her "Quinceanera I Never Had" reading event. By the time she read at "First Friday" she had already published a few books, but I had never heard her poetry.

There was one poem in particular that spoke to me. It was her poem "Proposal" that can now be found in her new book of poetry, Falling in Love with Fellow Prisoners. I loved that poem from the moment that I heard it. The funny thing was that I was married at the time so someone could ask why I loved the poem so much or how I could relate to it.

I think that many women can relate to the poem, even married women. I believe that as women we are socialized to grow up, get married, live happily ever after and sometimes women put their dreams on the back burner. That has always been an idea that I have struggled with because even married women should be married to themselves first. How else can you love yourself and in turn love your spouse and your family? I know many people don't agree with this idea and that's okay.

I subscribe more to the idea that a woman should put on her oxygen mask first. If I didn't do things to keep my sanity I wouldn't be able to take care of my kids and now more recently my elderly father. I have to be very sane in order to do what I do every day. If a woman is committed to herself she can be even more committed to her family.

Fast forward in time. Gwendolyn Zepeda published her book of poetry and I went to her reading. She didn't read "Proposal" that night, or she read it before I got there, so I didn't know it was in the book. She read a lot of other great poems like, "The Mexican in Me/The White in Me" and one of my other favorites, "His Son is His Everything."

I pre-ordered the book that same night but life carried me along the way life does and I never got to the bookstore to pick it up.

I was reminded about it on Facebook again and I mentioned "Proposal" to Gwen in hopes that I didn't sound too much like one of those weird obsessive nut/fans. (I had mentioned it to her before and that I lost my copy.) That's when Gwen told me that the poem was in her book and I remembered that I never went back to Brazos Bookstore. I made it a point to go pick it up and as soon as I got in my car with my book I turned the pages to the poem and I read it to my sister, as my son listened in the back seat.

It had been so long since I had read the poem that I had even forgotten the title. As I read it I was moved again by Gwen's words.

I've been divorced for two years now and the words never rang so true to me. I don't plan on remarrying and if I ever do, it won't be until the kids are in college or at least nine more years. I know that I don't know what can happen in nine years. I realize that. But for now, that's the plan.

I'm a single woman again and I want to be married to myself more than ever before. I am the woman I deserve and the last stanza of the poem is my very favorite.

"The day has come and I swell with pride.
I've finally captured the girl I deserve.
I'm ready to be my own bride.
I'll lock the rest of the world outside."

I'm ready to be my own bride.

Why Humans Reproduce

We reproduce for several reasons. I think one of the main reasons is the joy that we receive in seeing our child grow into a creative thinking creature. I felt this last night and this morning. I fell asleep earlier than my daughter, with my son, and my daughter came and woke me up and showed me a poem that she had written. Even in my half asleep state I was able to read and appreciate the poem.

When I woke up this morning I read it again and I appreciated it all over again. I remembered that she had said that she was inspired by the little crocodile poem in Alice and Wonderland. First I went and read that poem to see what she was talking about.

`How doth the little crocodile
Improve his shining tail,
And pour the waters of the Nile
On every golden scale!

`How cheerfully he seems to grin,
How neatly spread his claws,
And welcome little fishes in
With gently smiling jaws!' - Lewis Carroll, Chapter 2 of Alice in Wonderland

My daughter's poem was entitled "The Green Baby Grasshopper." It is such a wonderful poem full of creative imagery. To add to it she added her own little illustration. She drew a little grasshopper in bed, with the covers drawn up, and a little dresser with a lamp on it.

This is why we reproduce. I love my daughter! I love my crazy, wonderful, loud, creative, intelligent children. With that thought I end my last post of the year. Four years after starting this blog!

A Poem for Today

Very first draft and still needs work. Tell me what you think...

The Storyteller
By: Loida Casares Ruiz

He weaves his stories
That dad of mine
He weaves them like the ribbons
On a basket
In and out each ribbon goes
As I sit and listen to those tales
He weaves a story of his childhood
Of the Great Depression
Of a little boy who wore no shoes to school
But shined shoes for others
And bought ice cream and a bike
“Instead of shoes?” I wonder
He weaves stories about
The injustices his people faced
Of the Texas Rangers
And picking cotton in West Texas
Of signs that read
“No dogs or Mexicans allowed.”
Outside of diners
Leaving an impression
On a young boy
He tells of rides in trucks
To the pisca
About a man with a big twirling moustache
Of his brother making fun of the man behind his back
While he shook with the laughter building inside
Trying to suppress the chuckles
While their father glared at them
Promising a thrashing with his eyes
He weaves a story
That storyteller of mine
Stories that he told me as a child
Stories that he told me of my history
Stories that he told me of his past
Some are funny.
Some are sad…
Some I’d rather not know…
But he’s a storyteller and that’s what he does.